Recovering alcoholics say that you have to take it one day at a time. When that isn't working, take it one hour at a time. And when it gets really desperate, take it a minute at a time.

That advice has been on my mind, though I'm not really sure if it's applicable to present circumstances. Wendy and the kids leave this Friday. I just keep thinking "If I can make it through this week, if I can make it through this week..."

Separating is hard. It's hard on all of us ... the kids and my spouse and me, too. I guess it's obvious that, of the two of us, I'm the one who's more reluctant about this change. Well, hell, "reluctant" isn't the word. "Panicked" is a good word. "Dread" seems to fit in there somewhere.

There's an old Tori Amos lyric that comes to mind, too:

I got a bowling ball in my stomach,
Got a desert in my mouth.
Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now.

The more I think about it, the more sure I am that I'm gonna retire this blog and begin again on totally anonymous terms. A few people have asked me to e-mail them my new URL, and that makes me feel good. (Just keep it on the down low, homie. And I'll use a little more discretion this time with regard to the people I tell about my blogging hobby.)

I've been trying to think of a new URL. I need to do it soon while the terms with my web host will let me get one on the cheap.

I've amused myself with a few ideas that I thought were original and fairly funny ... only to find that they're already taken...

The one that I liked the most was Fear And Loafing.com, but of course it's already registered. No, I won't provide a link. Those bums stole my idea before I even had a chance to think of it, so they can generate their own traffic.

Oh, and here's something I found at Cracked.com, of all places. This really cheered me up some, and it's surprisingly thought provoking. Go check out Cracked's Five Things You Think Will Make You Happy (But Won't). (Language Warning)

I'm trying to focus on positive stuff, like my upcoming summer visits from my son and the fact that I've actually been eating healthier and exercising lately and I feel better for it. I really am trying to stay positive.

But I keep coming back to one thing: "If I can just make it through this week..."

Labels: Personal